ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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