i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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