you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize