Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
