stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
