they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
