I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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