im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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