Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
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