hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
