it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
So here I am, sexting at work.
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