She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize