I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
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