his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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