the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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