I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
You took a bar mat shot.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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