my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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