Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
