We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Less talking, more tequila
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
