HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
