the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
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should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
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What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.