so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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