im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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