you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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