Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
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