Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
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