just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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