didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
