Ambien. No doubt about it.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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