You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
