Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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