things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
