Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize