do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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