I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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