After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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