No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize