Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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