I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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