I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I have feelings that need drinking.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize