if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Randomize
