I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
This is classic penis vs brain.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
