My boss' voice literally gives me gas
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
