Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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