so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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