I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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