I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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