Sry I called you an 8
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
