the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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