my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
